Encouragement?

So... I received this weird sort of encouragement today...

I was--as is sometimes very usual for me--gracing the rows of books at Crux bookstore, located at Wycliffe College, U of Toronto and Hart House. While there I bumped into a colleague of mine that I've not seen in months. We began to chat, and as is often the case with PhD students at the end of their comp stage, we complained about the program, talked about the program's debilitating psychological effects, and generally complained about anything and everything we could think of. Then we talked about beer and contemplated how nice it would be to be able to go on anti-depressants (don't ask! If you're curious... read the Chronicle of Higher Education. It will give you the background for this one...)

Not too long into this conversation my colleague asked me, "Is it true that you thought of quitting a month ago?" Sheepishly, I replied, "Yes! I really thought about it... but decided against it, mainly because I couldn't bare the thought of starting over in some other career." Then, my colleague asserted, "Don't feel bad about it! I've thought of quitting at least four times!" (Ah! That's three more than me... Really... this may sound trivial, but being able to add and subtract at this level is good for me, for I fear that I don't exactly excel at math... I mean in an undergrad math class at U of Cincinnati, I was even given a calculator and could barely pull a B on my math exams! It's sad I know... anyway...)

What happened next, however, shocked me! My long lost colleague said, "I'm glad you've decided to finish." When I asked why, he said, "Because a bunch of us got together and said, 'If Reed can't finish this thing, then we're all screwed!'" (What I don't think my colleague realized is that I'd just thought, 'Wow! If he wanted to quit three times, then I'm pretty much up you know what type of creek and without you know what type of a paddle!). Now... lest I digress... I was somewhat flattered, because apparently I'd become some sort of "canon" for whether or not other PhD students could finish the program. But, what I couldn't quite figure out was why? Why had I become a "canon" for whether or not other PhD students could finish their programs?

I suppose I've fooled someone along the way. I'm not sure exactly what I've done, but all I can think of is that it must have something to do with my wardrobe. I'm beginning to believe this more and more. Yes, the wardrobe principal! People trust a guy who can wear a tweed blazer paired with a tie and a vest. Yet, what many people don't get is that I'm wearing these clothes to compensate for my own academic deficiencies... It's that old banking principle: If you want to be a CEO then for God's sake, dress like one! However, in my case it's: If you've got some academic deficiencies, then for God's sake cover them up by dressing like a serious academic! And, in N. America that means looking as British as you possibly can! (I don't know why, but that's what it means...)

Ah well... I think it has something to do with my sometimes George Costanza approach to life. Really! I'm not kidding!

I actually told the Chair of the Religion Dept. at Wright State that until he gives me a full-time tenured job I'm going to follow the Costanza principle and just act as if I'm tenured and work at Wright State full-time. What surprised me is that the Chair of the Religion Dept. laughed and said, "Hey... that's a pretty good idea... Maybe I should try that!" Hmm...

But... seriously... it's all about the wardrobe...

Word to all male readers out there... buy a used copy of Color for Men and read it...

David